Author: Vincent Maronski

Going into this class, I believed that it was going to be like every other writing class I had been forced to take over the years. My previous writing classes could have been better as we broke down different writing styles and just wrote continuous essays on rather pointless topics. However, I would find this class much different and defy my expectations. Our course epigraph from Octavia Butler’s “Bloodchild” says, “If we’re not your animals, if these are adult things, accept the risk. There is risk, Gatoi, in dealing with a partner.”. At first, it was unclear how this quote would navigate our thinking through this course but upon reflection at the end of the year, it has become quite apparent. Looking back upon my work I believe that the course epigraph forms through line for the work I’ve had the opportunity to engage in this semester. This quote has helped me navigate the idea that I am no longer a child living in this world but instead, an adult who can ask more questions and think deeper. 

At the beginning of this class, we wrote an essay that discussed what we believed we would get out of the class as well as what we thought we could bring to the table. I treated this first essay like I treated the rest of my previous writing classes and that was without much care or thought behind the words I was writing. I was trying to just get words onto a paper to complete an assignment instead of thinking deeper about the assignment and asking questions. This led to a lot of my thoughts being disconnected and completely unstructured. Instead of taking time to think deeper and have a plan for my writing, I would just write any idea that came to my mind. The advice I received from this essay was to slow down and unpack and although Dr. McCoy iterated that these were common words of advice at the beginning of a semester I still found them incredibly helpful. This advice helped me come to an understanding that not everyone in the world interprets things the same way. This was something that I already knew but I don’t think I understood the magnitude to which this was true. 

This was pointed out to me when Dr. McCoy asked what it was I meant when I said an “ordinary class” because while this was something that was clearly outlined in my brain I failed to understand that others had a different view. This helped me understand that I needed to think about things deeper and ask more out of myself. Applying this to the real world and not just my writing became a goal of mine which I think was really beneficial. Using this sort of deeper thinking I was able to start asking questions that I previously would have never thought of. I was able to practice this deeper thinking in my lecture classes. I found that when I was able to just sit and listen to someone speak it was easier to think of deeper questions and continuously ask why. I would either relay these questions to my professor or would look it up on my laptop but either way I would leave the class with a better understanding of the topic. I specifically remember sitting in my humanities class while the professor was discussing writing around the time of the French Revolution. When I would normally just sit there mindlessly listening I instead found myself scouring the web for different things about the French Revolution to gain an understanding of what was going on at that time. This allowed me to develop a better idea of what the author was thinking along with a better understanding of the writing we were working with as a whole. It was these types of things that this new thinking opened me up to. 

This idea of deeper thinking along with the class epigraph helped drive my final rewrite for my “Bloodchild” essay. Using the feedback from my first essay I was able to narrow down my thoughts and have one clear concise idea drive my essay, instead of an unorganized essay filled with a handful of ideas. This allowed me to go into further detail since I could put all of my thoughts and explanations into this one idea rather than trying to divide it up over multiple ideas. This idea that I was able to focus on was the idea that in my opinion college is not often how it has been described to people. I was able to come to this idea through deep thinking to go along with some reflection within myself. A line that I used in this essay was “College sounded like an extension of childhood filled with fun but it is the end of childhood filled with responsibilities and discomfort.” I believe that this quote sums up my idea for the essay. This is a conclusion that I was able to make through the guide of the course epigraph. I had to come to an understanding within myself that although college is known for its fun there is also a ton of responsibility to go with it as well as a ton of risks. The responsibility of taking care of yourself is something that I had the luxury of being oblivious to. My parents had helped me every step of the way to get to college but once I was here there was only so much they could do. I feel as though this was something that was rarely touched upon when I would have conversations regarding college with those I knew who had gone to or were in college. There was always discussion on how college would be the greatest years of my life but everyone failed to mention the multitude of risks associated with it. Through this process, I have learned that only good things happen when you continuously ask questions. I wonder if I had been introduced to this way of thinking before college if I would have asked more questions and perhaps been more skeptical of college as a result. All in all, the course epigraph helped mold the idea for my final “Bloodchild” essay as I expressed my concern for gaining more knowledge about college and asking tougher questions than perhaps we are. I will make sure that I attempt to spread this kind of knowledge whenever I can and whenever I am asked. Moving forward, I’d like to try and encourage others to allow themselves to engage in this type of thinking so they could further improve their lives. 

Nothing I can do will change the past, only the future which is why I must continue this way of expanded thinking through this next chapter in my life. Accepting that the past cannot be changed, I am forced to move forward with a more open-minded perspective, forming the next phase of my life. I am free to focus my energy on the possibilities of the future because I realize it is pointless to worry about things that cannot be altered. This dedication to broadening my thinking serves as my compass, directing decisions in my life that have the most thought behind them.

In Octavia E. Butler’s short story “Blood Child”, the group of people called Terrans is shown from a young age, what to expect before being implanted by a species called the Tlic. As the story progresses, we get an understanding of the knowledge that is shared with the Terrans in preparation for this sort of “coming-of-age”. High school students are like the Terrans while older people who have gone through college are like the Tlic. The common theme is that sometimes you may experience things differently compared to how they have been described to you.

Octavia Butler’s “Blood Child and Other Stories” is a story of two alien species that must learn to coexist together. The species whose planet this takes place on are known as Tlic while the “invaders” are known as Terran. Through time the two species manage to come to compromises and agreements that allow for them to live together. One of these agreements included the creation of the Preserve, a safe space for the Terran to live on the Tlic planet. Another agreement that the two species came to was that each Terran family would give up one of their children to be implanted with Tlic eggs for reproduction. The story itself is narrated by a Terran child named Gan and he mainly interacts with a Tlic by the name of T’Gatoi. T’Gatoi is a highly-ranking Tlic politician who works closely with Terrans and on page 5 of “Blood Child and Other Stories” by Octavia E. Butler she is described as a key contributor to the Preserve and protecting innocent Terran children from the “desperate” masses of Tlic. Gan’s mother at some point had promised T’Gatoi one of her children to be implanted as part of the Terran-Tlic agreement. On page 13, Gan describes how T’Gatoi had begun to show “diagrams and drawings” of this process and made sure that once Gan was old enough, he knew the truth. Throughout his childhood, Gan had been prepared for this night with T’Gatoi yet once he became witness to the result of this process he became petrified. On page 21 of “Blood Child and Other Stories”, after witnessing Lomas being cut open in this process, Gan says to his older brother Qui, “It’s not supposed to happen that way.”. This was Gan’s way of expressing that what he had been told and shown about this “coming-of-age” event was not true and portrayed in a much different way than the harsh reality that it is. I believe that this is comparable to the way that college was described compared to how it truly feels.

For some people growing up, college was seen as a standard, a non-negotiable of life that when you graduate high school your parents would send you to college. For others it was optional and for some, it was never expected out of them but regardless of their plans, almost everyone has heard someone try to convince them to go to college or tell them how it was the best years of their life. I see this as the equivalent to the showing of “diagrams and drawings” that were shown to the Terran children growing up as mentioned on page 13 of “Blood Child and Other Stories”. Throughout our childhood, we hear the college stories of years past, in preparation for what’s to come, and oftentimes these stories are filled with laughter, fun, and joy but I believe the way that college is portrayed to people is oftentimes not what they truly experience. People frequently describe how they’ve made friends at college that will last a lifetime. For some, these standards don’t even have to be said, for instance when a parent’s college friend ends up being a godparent or a close enough friend that you call them aunt or uncle. I found out that reality can be different than the expectations and standards that you’ve been shown. I’ve truly enjoyed my time here at Geneseo and I appreciate everyone I’ve met and that I am friends with but when I think about the times of my life filled with the most happiness, surrounded by my best friends, I think of home. Coming to this reality has been hard and at times it has been truly crushing. I spent all my life living up to college in anticipation of the most exciting and fun years of my life when in reality I was already living in those years. This is where I most closely relate to Gan. Gan begins “Blood Child and Other Stories” on page 3 with the sentence “My last night of childhood began with a visit home”. Gan is describing the night he was implanted by T’Gatoi, the moment he’s been preparing for his entire life, and he begins it by calling it the end of his childhood. College was my night with T’Gatoi. This experience that I’ve been dreaming about quickly shut down into the harsh reality of life. There was no comfort, no privacy, and most importantly, it wasn’t home. All of these things that I had been told growing up were crumbling before my own eyes. Something I remember being told specifically was that I would be lifelong friends with whoever my roommate happened to be. After meeting and living with my roommate for a week I knew this was not someone that I could see as this lifelong friend whom I’d have a great bond with. At first, it was hard for me to accept this reality because I couldn’t understand how my experiences could relate to any of the ones that had been shared with me. I then had a talk similar to that of Gan and his older brother Qui on page 23 of “Blood Child and Other Stories” where he was able to elaborate that this is how college truly was. The reality of college is that you may not connect with some people who you will be surrounded by 24/7. It is also true that the “diagrams and drawings” that I created in my head of college were not harsh enough. College sounded like an extension of childhood filled with fun but it is the end of childhood filled with responsibilities and discomfort.

I feel as though if we express college in its true light, an environment that is uncomfortable and filled with stress, it could help students be better prepared for coming to college. If people fully understood what to expect coming into college then the dropout and transfer rates should be lower. If there is expressed knowledge on college living given to students beforehand I believe that the number of students who are transferring or dropping out due to factors such as stress or being uncomfortable would decrease. Uncomfortable situations become more comfortable the more familiar you are with the situation so if we get this real knowledge of the raw college experience out to students they can be better equipped to face the challenges that await them. Students won’t feel as nervous coming into college and perhaps could be more open to the challenge of college. The best way to go about this would be to get students to give a true point of view of a day in their life. Oftentimes schools make videos about a day in the life of a student on campus but these videos almost always show just the bright parts of your day without highlighting the stress and frustration the day may produce. Students would get the most out of a video that showed everything about a college day including the good, the bad, and the ugly.

All in all, “Blood Child and Other Stories” by Octavia E. Butler highlights the idea that sometimes things are different than the way they’ve been portrayed to us. I find this to be similar to the way college gets described to students before attending college. If students were more aware of the harsh reality that college ends childhood and begins adulthood they would be better prepared to move forward.